Watching
by SMoonEmpress
Summary: Setsuna aka Sailor Pluto reflects on her forbidden love for King Endymion, as well as her station in life.


Title: Watch  
  
Author: SMoonEmpress  
  
Website: http://fairy-dust.net  
  
Rating: PG  
  
Summary: Setsuna reflects on her forbidden love for King Endymion, as well as her station in life.  
  
Series: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon  
  
No copyright infringement intended!  
  
Please don't steal my story!  
  
Hello everyone!   
  
This is my first time posting a fanfic featuring my favorite character from Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon, Setsuna Meioh aka Sailor Pluto! I sincerely hope you enjoy it!  
  
Please read and review!  
  
*Aishiteru means "I love you" in Japanese  
  
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I watch.  
  
It's my job, really. To stand at the gates of time and space and watch...  
  
But never interfere. At times I feel like a child in a toy store...told by some stern parent that I may look all I like, but I'm not allowed to take anything home. Watch, Setsuna. Watch the people be born, live, and die. But never, never interfere.  
  
Now I'm here...on earth...with my friends, and my queen, and it's even harder. I still watch...I watch Makoto-san try to teach Usagi-san and Rei-san how to cook cookies. I watch Ami-san try to explain Minako-san's math homework. I watch Small Lady as she steals Usagi's rice cake, and my arms ache to hold the tiny princess...the daughter of my queen...and my king.  
  
My King. Endymion-sama....  
  
Mamoru-san. Why do you look at me that way? Do you know? Do you see the sadness in my eyes? Can you hear my heart beat against my chest, whispering my secret?   
  
*Ai...shi...te...ru.....  
  
One day, Mamoru-san, you will be a mighty king. And I will love you even though it is forbidden. But I will never tell you...I will never know love. Because my duty is to watch.  
  
And I will watch. I will watch you...the way your fingers brush Serenity-sama's cheek...the way you spin Small Lady around in circles as her laughter floats up to my dominion in the sky...  
  
I wish...I wish...  
  
"Puu!! Come play catch with me and Mamo-chan!"   
  
I look up from the ground, Small Lady's voice interrupting my thoughts, and Mamoru-san's eyes meet mine. He smiles at me.  
  
Could he be smiling for me?  
  
"Yeah, Setsuna-san. It's more fun with three people." He tosses me a ball.  
  
I look at the ball in my hands. It is the size of a basketball, but made of plastic. Mamoru-san's fingers have left smudge marks on the surface. My fingers touch the same place and I close my eyes, imagining for a moment that it is his hand I'm touching.   
  
"...Puu? Are you okay?" I smile and open my eyes.  
  
"Hai, Small Lady. My head aches a bit, that's all." My heart aches a bit, that's all.  
  
I toss the ball to Small Lady, and she throws it to Mamoru-san. Mamoru-san turns towards me and throws it. I catch it. I'm caught up in the game and start to imagine it's only Mamoru-san, Small Lady and I, in this park on a warm spring day, surrounded by cherry blossoms and the sounds of new life. Small Lady is our child, and we are a normal family with not a care in the world, and I love Mamoru-san and he loves me. I hear laughter and realize with a start it's my own.  
  
It's been so long since I've laughed....  
  
Small Lady laughs with me, and Mamoru-san's laughter joins in, low, mixing with mine...  
  
"Mamo-chan!! The picnic is ready!!" Usagi-san catches the ball Mamoru-san had thrown to me, and we stop laughing. He smiles at her, the smile he only gives to her...  
  
"Hai, Usako." He takes her hand and they walk to the blanket laid out with Minako, Rei, Makoto, and Ami sitting on it. I sigh and stand very still, watching them leave. Chibi-Usa bounds over and grabs Mamoru-san's other hand, looking up at him with innocent love in her eyes.  
  
I watch them. But mostly I watch Mamoru-san...Endymion-sama...  
  
I close my eyes and engrave this memory into my mind. It is the closest I will ever come to him, and I must be content with it.  
  
"Setsuna-san! Come and join us!" Usagi-san calls, holding up a cookie Makoto-san had made.  
  
I smile and open my eyes, and look at my Queen. I can't be angry with her...she's so innocent, so kind, so...good.   
  
And so I will never tell. I will spend time with my friends on this planet. I will eat the cookies Makoto-san and Usagi-san made and comment politely on the good work Minako-san has done on the math problem Ami-san helped her with. I will play games with Small Lady and Mamoru-san.  
  
But I won't lie to myself any longer.  
  
I will only watch. 


End file.
